So So Def

Marjorie: "Da Brat is at the same brunch place as me. Yes, DA BRAT."

Me: "LOL, where?"

Marjorie: "A place called Barcode in D.C. I was getting my fried chicken at the buffet (don't judge), and I saw a girl looking mad hood. And I was like wait...it was Da Brat tat tat."

Me: "Hahaha so random. Is she from D.C.?"

Marjorie: "No clue. She had a jacket with So So Def on it. She could afford a nice weave, right? Instead of those janky braids?"

My Heart Will Go On, Part II

Marjorie: "I'm voting myself off this sinking ship."
Kristen: "We're taking you down with us!"

Me: "Clutching each other as we sink like that old couple in Titanic."

Krista: "Having sex in cars and shit."

Marjorie: "...what?"

Krista: "Have you never seen Titanic?!?"

Me: "Marjorie only remembers the scene where Billy Zane bitch slaps Kate Winslet."

Marjorie: "I mean, that's the best part, is it not?!"

Unemployment

Marjorie: "I'm going to quit my job and become a lady of leisure. How my shoe habit will be funded is TBD."

Karaoke

Marjorie: "I think I'm at the jankiest bar in the USA. I got dragged here by partners, and some old lady just flipped me off!"

Krista: "You must have deserved it!"

Marjorie: "I insulted the karaoke singer...who I think she's friends with."

Corporate America, Part III

Marjorie: "Except he's the senior exec, so I would prob be the one who is out of a job. On the streetz. With fab shoes. But still on the streetz."

Liam Neeson, Part II

Me: "I was watching an old Woody Allen movie last night and guess who showed up in it."

Marjorie: "LIAM NEESON. MY MAN."

Me: "Yup."

Marjorie: "Was he killing anyone?"

Me: "No, but he was a major home wrecker, for TWO different women."

Marjorie: "Love it."

Me: "Not gonna lie - he was pretty foxy, Young Liam."

Marjorie: "He is fine as hell. He's fine now. Werk."

Vocabulary

Marjorie: "Okay, well keep me up to breast."

Me: "Abreast, Marjorie. The word you're looking for is abreast."