Hallowen, Part II

Marjorie: "I wanna be Bobby Brown! You can be my Whitney!"

Me: "How are we gonna pull that off? No one will know who we are...."

Marjorie: "Yea they will! We'll just walk around and I'll smack you. COME ON!"

Halloween

Me: "Did I tell you what Zaj is gonna be?"

Marjorie: "No. Me???"

Latin Explosion

Marjorie: "Oo0h 'Livin' La Vida Loca'! I fux with Ricky!!"

Vocabulary

Marjorie: "You are such a hussbucket!"

Blackberry

Marjorie: "Why are you texting me?!?! Texting is SO 1997...."

Happiness

Marjorie: "Oh yeaaa, that's the BUSINESS!"

Hair Care, Part II

Us: "What is that stuff?"

Marjorie: "UGH have you NOT been to the black hair store?!?!"

Contract Negotiation

Me: "So how do you like your blog?"

Marjorie: "One word: royalties."

Friendship

Us: "I'm so sad, I can't believe college is over! So many memories...."

Marjorie: "Ah, nostalgia! Well, it was nice being friends with you!"

Anger Management, Part II

Marjorie: "You, you.....whoreanous shiteous tranny!!"

Life

Marjorie: "I'm just a squirrel trying to get a nut."

Photography & Wardrobe

Marjorie: "I can't wear that outfit. I wore it six months ago and it was documented on film. It would be a travesty to be seen in it again."

Photography

Marjorie: "I mean, when you're THIS fabulous, it would be a crime not to document it!"

Personal Issues

Marjorie: "You've been in New York for almost a year, when are you gonna get knocked up, locked up, and put in US Weekly!?!?!"

Cliches, Part II

Me: "You know you probably should fix your broken bed..."

Marjorie: "Ugh WHATEVER, it's a dog-eat-dog world out there!"

Cliches

Me: "Um Marjorie, your fly is down."

Marjorie: "Ugh WHATEVER, tomay-to, tomah-to!"

Cartography

Me: "Hey we're in Georgetown and we're kinda lost, can you Google Map where we are and give us directions?"

Marjorie: "Ummm sure....is this a bad time to tell you that I don't know how to read maps?"

Houseguest

Marjorie: "Hey so uhhh is it ok if I stay Sunday....with my baby?"

Violence & Photography

Marjorie: "Is your hair looking proper?"

Me: "Hell yeah!"

Marjorie: "Good just making sure I can be seen in pics with you."

Me: "What! I'll fight you."

Marjorie: "Bitch I will SHANK you!"

Keeping Up Appearances

Marjorie: "I can't, I have an appointment today. I needz to get my hair game proper."

Conduct at the Workplace

Me: "Maybe the website is blocked at your work."

Marjorie: "Please girl, nothing is blocked here. It's AMERICA. If I can go on bossip.com I can access Tory Burch."

Fergie

Marjorie: "Ugh, you are so 2000-and-NEVER."

Crimes & Trends

Marjorie: "Murderers are sooo yesteryear. The new thing is bestiality. CLEARLY."

Family

Marjorie: "Why does my sister, the lawyer, have a status that reads 'contemplating whose abs are sexier, Reggie Bush or Lance Gross'?"

Hair Care

Me: "Are you tweakin'?"

Marjorie: "Am I tweakin'? Does Beyonce wear a weave? (aka, the answer is YES)."

Anger Management

Marjorie: "I will cock-slap you!"

Biology

Marjorie: "The zoo!?! Why would we go to the zoo?!?"

Us: "Ummm to look at animals...."

Marjorie: "Isn't that what Google Images is for?!?!"

Gender Roles

Marjorie: "Sometimes I feel like a man trapped in a woman's body!"

Economics & Agriculture

Marjorie: "How much are cows these days? Like what's the mark up?"

Us: "Why the hell do you care about how much cows cost?"

Marjorie: "UGH I don't know, I'm just curious! BI-curious...."

Life, Death, & Geography

Marjorie: "He's six feet under - and I DON'T mean Australia."

Me: "What? Australia is The Land Down Under."

Marjorie: "Yeah, won't make that mistake again...."

Me: "Did you actually make that mistake?"

Marjorie: "Well I was sitting in class one day and this girl was saying how her grandfather is 'six feet under' and I was like 'Oh, he lives in Australia?'"