Music & Violence

Marjorie: "Is it sad that I am totally roxing out to Fall Out Boy's CD right now?"

Me: "Ewwww."

Marjorie: "Have you even listened you homewrecker? Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh."

Me: "Not a fan."

Marjorie: "Well I do it to it."

Me: "What was THAT noise?"

Marjorie: "The 'ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh'? That was me slapping your ass!"

Facebook

Marjorie: "You are a homewrecker. P.S. Don't reply on your OWN wall. DON'T YOU HAVE ANY CLASS?!"

Monetary Issues

Marjorie: "You owe me $1,000. You can wire it to me via Western Union. I dont trust your checks. Spanx!"

Cleaning House

Marjorie: "P.S. I think I have your shirt. It's Isaac Mizrahi and has some gold tie on it? I used it to wipe my toilet."